How I Began Accepting My Naked Body
(Guest Body Image Blog)
The Story Of The Semi Naked College Party That Helped In Accepting My Naked Body:
Accepting My Naked Body – I have always been self conscious about my body. I was never able to walk around comfortably at school for fear of being made fun of. My body was something to be hidden, shameful and god forbid – shown in public.
During high school, I started working on improving my self esteem. I worked on my positive affirmations and I told myself everyday that I was beautiful, even if I didn’t believe it. As the days turned into weeks, I began to notice that looking at my naked body in the mirror was becoming easier. I began to feel more and more comfortable being naked (by myself). That said, the thought of someone else seeing my naked body was still not an option. All this changed once I got to college.
When I started college, I felt overwhelmed by the amount of people I considered beautiful. It seemed like everyone was thin, confident and attractive. How was I going to survive here???
I talked with some close friends about the issue. My friends asked me what I thought of people who did not do their make up every morning or who were not thin enough to be a model. I told them I did not think any differently of them and that they were just people to me. My friends asked me why I thought that people would think differently of me. I did not have an answer.
Then it came to me… Most people do not care what you look like. And if they do, who cares! If they did not like my appearance, they did not have to look. After that, my confidence rose. It was a slow process, but it was working.
I had never been comfortable attending parties at my university. So many of them were pajama parties, underwear parties and even naked parties. If I was just beginning to feel comfortable looking at my naked body, how was I going to show it to anyone else?
Then came the day when I was invited to a college Halloween party. The flyer said “less is more… if you know what I mean.” My friends had helped me so much in raising my self-esteem that I thought, “why not!” That night, I had my first experience with social nudity. I wore some risque lingerie as my Halloween costume. Nearly everything was showing! I was afraid people were going to look at me like some kind of freak. I was afraid they were going to laugh and tell me to go home. But they didn’t. Almost everyone else was dressed like I was. Some were even completely naked and a few were covered in nothing but body paint. They were all just having a good time – partying and laughing. It was a great evening. I left the party feeling more confident than ever. My naked body, or at least most of it, was seen by strangers, yet no one laughed or ran away in horror.
I don’t know if I will ever rid myself of my body image issues. Nor am I sure that I will ever be able to look at my naked body with complete acceptance. What I do know is that my first experience with public nudity was a fun one. One that helped me in my ongoing process of raising my self-esteem and self-acceptance (if not “body love”).
This Body Image Blog titled Accepting My Naked Body was published by Young Naturists and Nudists America YNA